#homelander x chubby reader
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cupidkenji · 4 months ago
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If you think I'm pretty
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Pairing: Homelander x afab!reader CW: fingering, praise, slightly OOC homie, threats of captivity (he says hes gonna keep reader in the penthouse that's it I promise it's not genuine), cursing, sub!reader, porn without plot (I think this is applicable), they're in a relationship before this, reader says 'John' cause moaning homelander is funny as fuck Summary: Being a perfectionist, you're unsatisfied with a recent test score. Homelander has a cure for that. Disclaimer: reader is always thought to be chubby/fat but there are no physical descriptors here, just an FYI WC: 1,955 Genuinely idk I'd like to apologize for this. I fell out of my Criminal Minds hyperfixation like months ago and haven't written since so I'm really rusty. This is 100% a self-insert but reader is gn and not described other than the fact that they're AFAB. Also this was only proof read once so please point out typos if you see them <3
Your mother used to scold you for being too hard on yourself. Her face is virtually the only thing you can picture as your screen burns your eyes a bit. It’s too early for the high brightness of the device, having woken up before the sun could reintroduce your eyes to light. You’d set yourself up to wake slightly after midnight, intending to check the score of a huge test you’d taken months ago and simply go back to sleep in a matter of minutes. A rather stupid plan, in hindsight. You were questioning now if you knew yourself at all. Your phone had nearly been in your hand when you felt the cold burn of anxiety in your lungs. This test was a huge fucking deal. You were a hardcore perfectionist on top of that, trying with countless futile attempts to surrender your idea of the model score. You just needed to pass, not get your professor to memorialize you in marble for your pure genius. You’d gotten up instead of turning on your phone, brushing your teeth and making your bed before pacing the room slightly while you thought. Essentially, you were just allowing the mantra of ‘cope’ to bound back and forth between your ears for a couple minutes. You weren’t sure if you wanted to cope with the disappointment of a lesser score, or you were telling yourself to come down a couple pegs and be happy with getting by. The repetition of the word soothed that icy-hot feeling that had festered from your lungs to your fingertips, and you checked.
You were fine. Not the score you wanted, but you were fine. 
Mentally you writhed against the slump of your shoulders, but the weight of this self-inflicted shortcoming hit harder than you were capable of defending yourself from. The long sigh you let out was all frost as the tension left your airways. How underwhelming. You laid down on the bed you’d made not ten minutes ago, hearing the window slide open a few seconds into your pity party. You normally left it unlocked for him, knowing if anyone else attempted to enter your home, he wasn’t far. He told you himself that he seemed to have tuned into you specifically; swearing he’d be able to hear you on the other side of the city if you needed him.
“It’s way too early for you to already be having a bad day. The sun’s not even up.” He was closer now, fully sealed into your space and approaching you with comfortable footsteps. You never fully got over the irony of seeing America’s greatest hero flying through your window in sweatpants. “What’s wrong?” You always noticed the subtle way he changed how he spoke around you. In every interview or interaction you’d ever witnessed of his, he’d spoken like a character. For a man who hated having his words scripted, he spoke the same as every cookie-cutter movie he’d starred in. He didn’t talk that way with you, something you hoped was subconscious. A demonstration of the safety he felt around you.
You shrugged in response to the question. You acknowledged the trivial nature of your feelings, knowing you probably reeked of sadness to him but attempting to downplay it anyways. “Bad test score.”
He sat down next to you on the edge of the bed, allowing you the space to remain sprawled out. “Doubtful.” He laughed slightly as he said it, shaking his head and smiling. He looked at you, his eyebrows furrowing minorly. “What’d you get?”
“A four.”
“What were you hoping to get?”
Your voice was barely audible as you spoke, knowing he would pick it up but also trying to spare yourself the rush of immaturity hearing yourself speak would bring. “A five.”
He sighed - a sigh full of endearment that his eyes reflected as he looked at you. You told him once that his eyes were the first thing you’d noticed. It was sunny the day you’d met, and they looked practically ethereal. You’d seen such chaos reflected in them even from day one. The masses called him ‘soulless’ often, but you couldn’t understand such an accusation from anyone who had ever seen him. His eyes were practically overflowing with soul, every time you looked at him it was all you saw. They were capable of incredibly dangerous things but they were so entrancing. He was so fucking enticing. 
You broke the eye contact, but he nudged your leg and moved his head to try and follow your eyes. “Hey-” He called for your attention, so you looked back at him. “You know that’s a good score, right?”
You smiled small at him. “No- I know. I’m just…I don’t know- strict with myself.” You found it hard to put into words. You knew you’d done well, but the ability to feel pride felt withheld from you. Like your eyes bore into it but your mind refused to distribute the feeling it brought to something tangible.
“I think you’re just too much of a fucking perfectionist.” His hand was splayed across your upper thigh from where he sat. No matter which part of you he touched, he had a grip that made your head spin. He was so sure of himself, the strength demonstrated from such an unassuming form never lost the novelty that it’d held when you met him. “Can’t let yourself admit when you did good.”
You tried to be dismissive, but it was hard to fake anything with a man like him. “As if you aren’t, John.” His jaw got the slightest bit tighter at the use of his name. Such a miniscule action that easily dodges the eyes of people who aren’t looking. You couldn’t really imagine not looking at him.
“I’m serious.” His face was still relaxed, but the expression in his eyes had shifted. His pupils dilated and his full attention was on you. “You did good.”
The only con of being with somebody with abilities such as his was the lack of secrecy. You used to laugh with your friends about how grateful you were for the discrete nature of arousal when living without certain body parts. That went out the window when you started seeing him. He knew the second anything shifted within you. He had every perversion you’d ever dreamt about practically categorized by the time your two month anniversary had rolled around. One of his favorite pastimes was casually working a turn-on into conversation and just watching you squirm.
You fought the urge to pull away from his hand, feeling your stomach drop slightly at a declaration like that. “Thank you.” You looked away from him again. Something you knew he didn’t really like but choosing to try and save face over anything else. 
“Yeah…I don’t know.” You could see his focus on the topic increasing by the second. His disposition was happy, but he held serious and almost threatening undertones. He tightened his grip on your thigh and you looked at back to him, hesitantly following the silent command to keep your eyes up. “I think you should say it.”
“John-” His assertiveness was starting to get to you, it always did. You sat up on your forearms to be a little more level with him but he moved his hand from your thigh to your stomach and pushed you back down. The thought of having to lay there and explicitly state that you did well on your test felt like a kid having to write in repetition on a chalkboard in detention. 
He was looking down at you, the eye contact making you slightly dizzy. His face was kind, it almost always was when he was around you, but the conversation was derailing. “I just think it’s important that you understand this.” He was so good at making you want what he thought was best.
You inhaled, swallowing your pride and licking your lips. “What do you want me to say?”
That familiar, condescending smile was starting to creep onto his lips. “Just tell the truth.” His eyebrows raised slightly in a silent prompt. “Say you did good.”
His hand was descending from your stomach, making it’s way to the hemline of your underwear. You hadn’t bothered to change out of what you were sleeping in, only now realizing the vulnerability of it. You held your tongue for a moment, breathing out a quiet “I did good.” 
He tore the only fabric between his hand and you off your body as easily as ripping a sheet of paper and leaned in a little more. “Say it again.”
“John-” You said it as barely an exhale as he skimmed his hand over you. You hadn’t even registered just how sensitive or how wet you’d gotten in the few minutes you were talking to him.
“I don’t know why you act so fucking noble. You should be running Ashleys around in circles or giving interns your coffee order. Not any of this testing bullshit that you’re too good for anyway.” His tone elevated to that mocking, cocky tone that swept into the most shame filled crevices of your mind and tugged the most deprived parts into the driver seat. He thumbed at your clit while he spoke, increasing and decreasing the pressure whenever he felt like it and effectively snatching any remaining ability to form coherent thought from your grabbing hands. “You’ve been chosen by a God, honey. You can do anything, I can give you anything.” He got breathier as he spoke, seemingly soaking up the desperation you were excreting and matching it in a tenfold.
You felt two of his fingers enter you effortlessly and you couldn’t stop yourself from gripping his arm. You always felt the power imbalance most in times like these. A feeling like pulling an angel away from heaven just for yourself, combing through it’s wings with your fingers or trying to lap up a fraction of that status in a wildly inappropriate disregard for the natural roles of nature. He was so much more than you, but he just wanted you to feel good. You swore under your breath as he started circles on your clit. He never got hand cramps, never got tired. He would go until you couldn’t anymore.
“That’s it.” He had barely said it, more just exhaled the assurance under his breath. You were close, you’re sure he could feel it. “Gonna move you to my penthouse. Keep you braindead and needy.”
 It shouldn’t have hit you the way it did. Considering who he was, he could easily fulfill that promise with nobody at Vought even thinking twice. It was the way he said it, the way he acts. Always needing control and always right. The most powerful man alive spent his time fantasizing about control over you, and your stomach twisted in disgust at how badly it got you off.
He slowed his movements as your high declined. He was breathing heavy, but your heart was beating like a drum. He had the smallest smile on his face like the sound gave him a sense of satisfaction. You rose to your forearms, this time with no protest from him, and watched him stand up. He held the back of your head with the hand that wasn’t nearly dripping and kissed the top of your head. It was chaste and quick, but the domesticity of it made your throat ache. He uttered something about getting a towel to clean up, stating he’d be right back before exiting the room. 
You rushed the words out before he could leave. “But you didn’t-”
“Next time.” He just waved you off. “I just thought you deserved a little reward.”
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writing-for-the-gays · 3 months ago
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Homelander x Fat! transmasc reader
Ao3 link
I love you like an alcoholic
go ahead read it you know you wanna
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queenmayor23 · 1 year ago
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I started writing a story about Homelander milking a chubby male reader like the cow he is but I don’t remember where I put it.
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laenyrasdarling · 4 months ago
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Hiii! Can i ask for an Haelena/ fem! Targaryen reader headcanons? No nsfw but romantic. Reader is the daughter of Rhea Royce and Daemon
.ೃ࿐helaena targaryen x fem!targaryen/royce!reader 
✦ some notes on the setting; pre-dance, with helaegon and the twins (+ aegon’s debauchery) still present, daemyra being alluded to whilst he’s married (frostily) to rhea and she to laenor, vizzy t’s in a somewhat fortunate state of health, i am here for helaena her only and the worldbuilding Shall reflect it
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ׂׂૢ having spent much all of your formative years residing in the grassy hills and wild thatches of runestone with your mother and her family, your varyingly absent father’s request to depart to king’s landing not long after your coming of eight and ten felt like something not very far between a dare and a terror. 
ׂׂૢ as abbarantly furious as this suggestion had initially made your dear mother and grandsire, over the course of some weeks your gentle insinuations that some winters in the red-roofed capital may be of benefit to a silver-haired, violet-eyed lady such as yourself before she returned to her homeland to continue her path ontoward ruling runestone in her mother’s footsteps, you successfully found enough cracks in your doting family’s bronzed armour to see them abate. 
ׂׂૢ so armed with enough belongings to last you from late spring to the following summer and the strongly pressed guidance from your grandsire that this temporary dalliance was only so you’d return equipped with better skills and knowledge with which to one day rule over your true homeland, you set sail for king’s landing. knowing all at once that you were only permitted to embark on this journey for varying ploys that were not yours - your grandsire’s to see you evolve to a competent ruler, your father’s to better his standings in your all but estranged uncle viserys’ eyes - you tried to not let these meddling hands of fate dissuade you from also using this time for your own endeavours.
ׂׂૢ and none so prevalent was that mission made to you than when you first laid eyes on the princess helaena upon your arrival to the red keep.
ׂׂૢ this was around the time you first found yourself thankful for your father’s meddling, as his suggesting in his letter that you make yourself of use to your hosts and aid the lady helaena in her childrearing and courtly duties meant that you arrived pre-prepared with a reason to find yourself in her company so often. as frostily as things began, with you nervously hovering around the edge of the room as the twins played and she sewed stiffly, with suppertimes just as cold with the added intrusions of her fool husband and snide-tongued younger brother, summer had barely begun to depart on your first year when things began brightening.
ׂׂૢ your transition from outcast to dearly-held began in benign ways - jaehaera growing familiar with your shadow-still presence in the family’s quarters and growing bold enough to beckon you forth with a chubby-fisted hand, that held aloft a dragon figurine for you to join her in play with. then came your wine-fuelled back-and-forths with aemond at the dinnertable, earning you both your cousins’ delicately-balanced respect, along with that of ser otto - and later, when helaena would find herself peering from over parapets to catch a glimpse of you besting even some of the kingsguard in the training yard with your bow skills.
ׂׂૢ the gradual quality with which you immerse yourself into her life escapes even her, until she begins to find herself noticing when your relentless energy and imaginative ploys are absent from the twins’ mornings and when you deem to take ale with aemond and his goons instead of joining her and alicent for supper. 
ׂׂૢ her status as a crown princess, and one betrothed to the king’s eldest son at that, taken into account, means that it’s probably once in a blood moon that helaena needs to ask for anything. which is what makes it mean all the more than it already does when she starts asking for your company.
ׂׂૢ and oh, how unendingly glad is she that she did.
ׂׂૢ her droll mornings become filled with your endlessly interesting talk of runestone, and your studies, and the things you’ve noticed since your arrival here (much of which she may not quite understand, but loves to listen to all the same). you’re by her side for each meandering stroll through the gardens that seems to take longer and longer each passing day, for every family meal that you manage to instill life and laughter into, for each lavish ball that she no longer fears now that she has you on her arm to keep her grounded and safe.
ׂׂૢ it’s the confident ease that you carry yourself with that endears helaena to you so much. how no task, no conversation, no idea is below or above you; that you’ll see the good and the worth in everything and everyone like it’s as easy as breathing.
ׂׂૢ so really, it’s no wonder that when it’s drawing late one night and you haven’t swung by her quarters with that darling smile of yours to wish her goodnight like you always do that when she goes in search of you, she finds you having dismissed the handmaids for the night and taken to tidying up the twins’ toys and study materials yourself. in the light of the still-flickering hearth, you look as heavenly a woman as helaena’s ever seen; so she’d be forgiven for finding herself kneeling so very close to you on the stone floor as she helps you stow figurines and charcoals away, and for losing herself in your lilac eyes that she doesn’t realise she’s leaning in until her lips are already on yours.
ׂׂૢ from there, it’s another slow descent - but helaena ensures not to miss a second of it this time around.
ׂׂૢ linked arms as you stroll through the gardens become held hands and guiding palms on the smalls of backs when no-one’s looking. the sewing lessons she’s insisted on walking you through end up looking more like you sitting back against her legs, as she loops her arms around yours and guides you through each stitch with her own hand, and now it’s a heatwave in the north before you’ll trade an evening with her for drinking with her fool brothers.
ׂׂૢ and you best believe, that’s only the very beginning.
ׂׂૢ she has dreamfyre saddled for two, and laughs through your terrified screams as she takes you so high into the clouds that you fear she’ll never possibly find her way back down. but really that’s your fault, as if you didn’t hand so tight onto her waist and bury your face into the crook of her neck, she would have no reason to delight in your flights as much as she does.
ׂׂૢ none of the articles of clothing you arrived with are now without alterations from her hand. a tiny, glittering arrow on a dress sleeve, a bronze-threaded neckline that seems to merge with an emerald-toned green as it sweeps down your back, all so subtle but done with love that they ease a smile onto your face every time they catch your notice again. and that’s not even taking into account the garments that are her design and commission alone, which now make up more than half of your wardrobe - rich, silken robes in every colour you could dream of, soft undershirts better suited to the warm climate of king’s landing than the heavy cotton ones you brought with you, gowns to match hers for all the balls she now drags you to on her arm.
ׂׂૢ her demure nature accounted for, she personally rejects any talks of vows for your hand - right down to seeing to it that all visiting noblewomen who appear to find too much interest in your bright eyes or warm laughter won’t find themselves having any business being in your company again.
ׂׂૢ on nights where she really just can’t bear to part with you until the morning, she’ll have her most trusted maidservants beguile her guards with a lie about her feeling poorly and asking you to stay with her for company; ensuring there’ll be no questions if anyone were to find the princess and a noblewoman entwined in bed together, cuddled so close it’s doubtful they could ever be parted.
ׂׂૢ it’s in moments like those, so sweet and so sacred, where the safety of your arms emboldens her so that she’ll dare to speak beyond the here and now. about her dreams of renouncing aegon, of taking the twins and you and flying as far as dreamfyre will take you, until you find a place that’s safe. safe for her to take you as your wife, for all the issues of succession and war to be a distant memory, where she can be a seamstress and you a farmer and the twins whatever they so want to be.
ׂׂૢ and torturously, those moments where she feels brave enough to speak plainly are the ones you find you just don't have the heart to give her the same honesty. so you kiss her forehead, brushing back silvery strands of hair as you settle in against one another and pray that your dreams lead you both to the same place where you may be able to live out that fantasy if only for a night.
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adrianasunderworld · 2 years ago
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​Housewardens X Chubby!reader
This has been sitting in the drafts for ages. But for all my fellow Plus size Twst fans out there. 
This isn’t light hearted in tone like the Obey Me one, but even so, I hope you enjoy.
Just like with the Obey Me one, I do mention body insecurities concerning weight. 
Riddle
Riddle is the one who has a lot to unpack. With his moms obsessive calorie counting and portion sizing, I wouldn’t be surprised if she had instilled in Riddle the idea the being over the average weight=the worst thing you can be. Riddle may not be rude to your face about it. But you can feel the judgment.
After his Overblot and realizing he was wrong and needing to mellow out a bit, is when he realized how horribly he had misjudged you. If you had been purposefully avoiding him so as not to deal with his bullshit, Riddle will apologize with you the first chance he gets, because who knows when the next chance will be? 
Over all Riddle has come a long way since coming to NRC, and he is your #1 defender. He will not hear any rudeness towards you. It is off with the heads of anyone that wants to make a comment about your weight or anyone else who is also plus size for that matter. 
Leona
In his homeland it’s actually viewed as a good thing to have extra weight. A bit of a hold over from the olden days of famine when people still lived off the land. Caring more weight meant you were taken care of and nowadays it’s a cute trait. So Leona does not mind at all, and has no qualms telling you he likes it.
You will be a pillow for this asshole. If you find him napping somewhere, you will be dragged down and have him lay on your stomach. 
Pretty much all of the guys from the Sunset Savanna are in the same boat as Leona for the as mentioned above reason. So they’re all cool, and if anyone ever bullies you for being plus size, you can call up one of them. 
Azul
Azul is the one that well and truly gets it. When you vent or recount a story about how the store carried nothing in your size. The times you felt the judgmental eyes of others. Or when you had to get off a ride because the seatbelt was a touch too small to buckle. It’s been a few years since Azul had been in your position, but that fat kid he was never truly left him in the back of his mind. Sure some of the other housewardens may be sympathetic, but Azul is the one that really understands how horrible it can all feel.
It’s one of two things with Azul. Either you are someone like him, who is self conscious and wants to loose weight, he’ll help and share tips on what helped him. (For a modest fee of course) On other hand, if you are comfortable and confident in your skin, Azul has a level of respect for you, and even a bit jealous. Your prior surroundings had not been cruel enough to you where you had endure the mockery he did. And if you were bullied for your weight, you didn’t allow it to break you. That quality alone is something Azul admires in you. In a way it makes him wonder how he would have been if his environment had been kinder to him.
Azul will not tolerate anyone who is rude to you for your weight. Even if it doesn't matter to you, it does to him. He’s not projecting, what? You’ll find minor annoyances like that start go away after awhile. If you ever comment on it he’ll simply go, “Oh really? I hadn’t noticed. But it so much nicer without people like that yapping away when they're not wanted?”
Kalim
It has genuinely never occurred to Kalim. Well, not occurred but rather it’s not something he thinks about. Like he knows you're chubby, but he doesn't pay it much mind. If you’re some who is on the shy side, he has a knack for making you comfortable. If you’re more extroverted, you’ll get along with him phenomenally.
Kalim unabashedly adores you. He gives his affection you, whether that be platonic or romantically, without any thought. You’re one of his favorite people. 
If Kalim did have comment about your chubbyness, it is always positive. Boy loves to hug and cuddle you, he loves it. Give him all the snuggles.
Vil
Despite how Vil will diet at at the slightest sign of weight gain, he doesn’t expect that of you, that is just what he puts on himself. Unless you are part of something liek the VDC training camp, Vil will never impose his strict diet or routines onto you if that is not what you want, and you will never hear him comment on it either.
Vil doesn’t really care about you being on the plump side, what he does care about is whether or not you are making any effort. You know he doesn’t take sloppiness. If you tell him you have trouble shopping for your size, Vil will find something. 
Overall, despite being in a very vain industry and the rigid beauty standards he hold himself to, Vil has met many talented and gorgeous people of all shapes and sizes. So he views you in that same regard: Someone wonderful that he cares about dearly.
Idia
Let’s be honest, Idia does not care. If anything you guys are on opposite ends of the spectrum, you’re chubby (and if you’re short too like me, welcome to the club) and then you have this tall lanky mf. If anything Idia wishes he could gain a little weight so he can stop being called a radish sprout. 
 If you and Idia are romantically involved in some way, expect your thighs to be his new obsession. Even if you are not together and it’s just a crush on his part, he’s going to be thinking about it. He would like very much to have to have his head in your lap please. 
Unironically calls you “Thicc AF”. I will let you decide for yourself if that is an endearing quality or not.
Malleus
Like Kalim, Malleus Doesn’t really care nor think about it. Fae don’t really have the same concept of fatphobia or body image issues like humans do. Plus a some very famous fairies are also on the more plump side. Malleus doesn’t really care. If you are self conscious about being chubby or tell him that other people are, this is all news to him. 
But it’s one of those things that, once you bring it to his attention, Malleus finds he likes those qualities about you. Whether that is in general or jsut because they are your traits remains to be seen. But Malleus finds he enjoys holding you, or laying on your stomach, lap, or chest if you will allow it. (Romantically or if you guys are just close like that.) 
If people gave you crap about your weight, you will find that is no longer a  problem, because no one wants the ire of a dragon for bullying his child of man.
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plasticfangtastic · 1 year ago
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American Royalty. Ch. 7
A Homelander X F! Reader/dadlander fanfic
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A/N: if ya like to be included in the taglist plz leave a request comment, prev. chapters can be found in my pin post and the link below... i'll be updating my pin post after chapter 8 or 9 so they're not so scattered-- thanks to all readers hope y'all like it. I have officially finished writing this story so I should be posting them more regularly.
tags: mild gore, angst, slow burn, fluff, OC characther, child neglect, dadlander, romance, toxic relationship... a bit of spicy in this chapter.
Chapter Seven
Sharp.
One of the men who looked to be a scientist– and who seemed completely detached from the situation, caught your attention.
“The V. Homelander.” he said, hiding his irritation poorly.
“The kid returned them to me. I left them at the gymnasium. Dropped some. The matter is sorted.” He spat, not giving him a second look, his gaze solely focused on you.
The man swallowed heavily slowly turning towards you, as you stared blankly back at him you noticed the chubby man had been carrying your daughter's sparkly backpack.
“Your daughter. I need to speak to her.” He said hastily.
“You don’t need to” Homelander blocked his vision, standing between you two enraged that he wouldn’t leave you alone.
“Is… Is okay…” Your hands were shaking as you pushed him out the way– my daughter did something really wrong…” You turned to Nigel, your voice wavering as you tried to muster the courage to speak– I am so sorry… I… I’m sorry” You choked.
You had no choice but to take her out of Vought, you knew you could never dream of paying off whatever damages your daughter had incurred on your name, V had to cost a couple hundred-thousands to millions if you had to take a guess, and whatever strange feelings you had a second ago were buried deep with the violent onslaught of anxiety assaulting you– you knew you would be back on the streets if not in jail by the end of the week.
You clutched at your hands feeling your whole body trembling, a sudden jolt traversing across your body as Homelander wrapped an arm across your shoulders trying to contain your relentless shivering, his far away voice told you to take a deep breath, whispering to you words that your ears didn’t quite catch, patiently instructing you to tranquilize to no avail.
“Your daughter, she wrote this.”
The man mustered all his bravery to take a notepad out of her backpack and approach you with it not caring that Homelander was holding you posessively, you looked up towards the item, taking it in your hand– lots of formulas and calculations, her handwriting blocky and messy, but every page was filled with more and more things that you could frankly not decipher– it might as well been hieroglyphics.
“Sorry I don’t understand this.” You were hesitant to hand it back.
“Your daughter managed to do this!.” He went to a particular page of the pad, flicking it in your hands– this… this is a revised version of a new product we had been developing… a new version of V… Your daughter is not in trouble… quite the opposite we would like to extend an olive branch– am so sorry security handled this so poorly.”
Both you and Homelander had matching expressions, both confused as to these sudden changes.
Nigel gasped in relief as Elmo came running towards his father dragging Helena behind him. The man could have hit the child if you weren’t there, he took his son in one swift sweep, holding him tight trying not to sound upset as he kissed him, looking down to find Helena panting behind, the kid hugged his father but didn’t cry–  simply turning to see if Helena was still there.
“Don’t look at me like that.” She replied before the kid rolled his eyes– those guns were loaded y’know.”
“Won’t hurt me” The kid muttered– hurt you lots tho.”
She scoffed and rolled her eyes, before finally acknowledging your existence. Peeking at the mess around her and the decapitated head on the other end of the hallway that Elmo completely ignored, she bit her cheek letting a loud ‘Tch’ spit out.
“Before you scream at me– The chump had nothing to do with it, I simply asked for his services in exchange for candy. Second…” A bubble pop above her hand dropping a half-used vial of Compound V– here” She threw at the scientist.
“Is almost empty!”
“I used it, duh” She wasn’t apologetic in the least– now you can scream at me.” she gestures to you to procceed.
You dropped on your knees pulling her into your arms in a vicious and desperate embrace, your heart beating so hard she could feel it thumping against her white sweater, you tried not looking at the empty stare of the decapitated head on the other side of the hall… it was your fault that man had died, you thought. Yet you were glad Homelander had killed him. Glad he had done one right thing for her.
“You have a lot of explaining to do.” Homelander said without actually caring, he was glad to see her unharmed, seeking for any scuff marks or bruises with his X-Ray vision.
Your daughter looked at the scientist then at her belongings.
“I fixed it… your C.V24… in theory of course. Technically you were on the right track with V25 but my formula should reduce the side effects by 76% percent not 67%… would be down to 85% if I had more time.” She strokes your back in circular motions to fake reassurance– sorry for acting like a kid… I did a stupid.”
The man clenched his jaw then looked back at the notes, the formula in theory could be the pathway to finding a solution to all their troubles, Homelander mouth dropping in disbelief.
“What do you mean you fixed it?” He asked.
“Your original formula is a death trap… a shit dilution of V– all bark no bite… your stabilizing was the issue… V is a beast with a mind of its own… even your current serum is a mess… you could even program it to dictate a power if your men used their brains for once– so I decided to do that… now Elmo can fly.”
Nigel's eyes widened.
“You… You experimented on your friend?” You asked, your voice scratchy and hoarse.
Your daughter's eyes blip blue as she gives you a discomforting smile, you didn’t know if you should hold her or take a step away.
“I was thinking of administering the new serum as a pill or like an LSD sticker.” She wriggled away from you and towards Elmo as his father took a step away from those shimmering blue eyes– show him Elmo.”
Elmo nodded obediently with a light push he wiggled upwards and floated close to the ceiling.
“I was aiming for laser or pyrokinesis but again I only had a couple weeks to come out with the formulas… had I had more time.” she grumbled.
“You gave him V25?” Homelander asked, plucking the kid by the leg down to eye level– how…?”
“Nah I gave him my new V serum… I gave it to him like two hours ago… I was working on the V.C 26 on paper but I was messing with V… altho if the mices I worked with are any indication– he might still explode in three hours give or take”
Her nonchalant tone was matched by a small kid who seemed far too exhausted with her, Elmo dropped to the ground. Homelander was mostly in awe that the kid could fly after only two hours and based on her heartbeat she wasn’t telling the truth entirely, but he kept it to himself for the moment.
“He could explode! You could’ve killed him already!” The scientist spoke on your behalf looking at the child horrified.
“Maybe you should’ve kept him in the labs instead of dragging us here… bit rich for you to care considering you experiment on people all the time without their consent…. Sage Grove, Elmira… Godolkin… should I keep going? Great timing to grow a conscience, clown.” 
She took her bag off his hands, and her pad.
“Left you a sample if you'd like to test it out… hope you copied it because I ain’t giving it to you for free”
“That’s Vought property!” He tried taking the notepad from her hand, she jumped back lifting her chin for a thick invisible wall to divide the space– you little–
An invisible force maneuvers him flat against the wall, his cheeks pressed comically against the translucent sheet.
“Am I in trouble?” She looked at her father.
“Can you squeeze him flat?” He asked, looking curiously at the scene.
“Can hold back a thousand gallons… what do you think?” 
“Let him go. Get the kid under observation and let’s see what this nerd wants.” He said with a jovial tone.
It was like a scene of a bad movie, you were simply forced to watch as they both bonded over their mutual awfulness– the rest of the evening became a blur, your body had moved but you weren’t piloting it, sounds measly echoes as you followed them around, occasionally catching Nigel and now presumably his husband Sven talking as he had joined the party by the time you noticed you had arrived in the labs… unsure when/how you got here.
Your body observed as Helena dragged the scientist and now a small posse of coated men to discuss her work, you left to sit alone in one of the rooms.
The lights were low, and at some stage Homelander had come in– it was painfully silent until he arrived, but you were just there, half-alive.
“What are you looking at?” Homelander said in a hushed voice as he touched you with a naked hand– can you tell me?”
“There’s a scratch on that metal panel” your voice is so quiet it scares him slightly.
His hand was so light on your shoulder, as if it was hovering instead of being there, he took a chair and pushed it to your side, you both sat together as you scrunched up his cape once he offered you the tip, your hands unconsciously picking up the fabric– the texture like thick culderog.
“We took the kid to Disneyland then the kid acted like they were at Disneyland and we got upset about it.” He said, Homelander’s hand atop of yours as you fidgeted– is okay, daddy has taken care of it, you are not in trouble, baby.” his voice was slightly mocking but it was trying to crack a bad joke– not to insult you.
He leaned against you, feeling the sharp metal edges of his eagles against your shoulders. You started to blink harshly trying to push away the fog with this discomfort, his arm on your hip as he rested his chin atop of your head– he was pulling you into a side-hug, meeting no resistance to his surprise.
“You don’t have to worry 'bout anything.” His voice is warm– am a hero, remember?”
“That kid is going to die…” you whimpered.
“Elmo Cripple is perfectly fine.”
“She didn’t care.” Your voice, starting to crack once again.
“She’s a very confident young lady.” he grimaces– a tad too confident if I say so myself… but you should hear her talking to those guys right now, is incre— I have no idea what she’s saying.”
“Welcome to my life” You nuzzled yourself against him, he was so warm, you could remember the heat– I… I don’t know what I am going to do with her?” You sobbed lightly.
“Let her pursue her dreams while supervised so we don’t have to deal with potential murder charges.”
He tried to make you laugh with his tone but all you could muster was staring back at him with a furrowed brow, your tears staining your cheeks already.
“‘Phantasma and Poltergeist’ I don’t how I feel about our kid being in a team-up… even if the competition isn’t steep– It’ll get difficult as she gets older but then again I don’t want Ryan to compete directly with her for the spotlight, its two different markets with completely different appeals.”
“I don’t want to talk about her being a superhero when we haven’t even handled this…” you said, holding back a sob, trying to clean your face against him.
“... ‘we’?” His hands gave your side a squeeze as his other took your hands more gently making sure to rub your dried knuckles– I think we can handle this, Y/N… we can keep a short leash on her… from now on– rely on me… you deserve that."
Staring back at her happily explaining her process, enjoying seeing the group of Phds feelings of inferiority coloring their faces, it was obvious that she shouldn’t even be in the 10th grade, simply staying behind for your well-being, but just how big was her IQ– how much more smarter was she? 
Homelander wanted to see his bouquet of peonies set as the centerpiece she was meant to be, to let her shine as she deserved.
You pulled on his wrist wanting to be held more, it didn’t matter if it was your shitty ex-boyfriend or not, you wanted affectioness, longing for empathy and gentleness.
You already had been kissing– in public no less! He had plans of holding you hostage until you agreed to play house with him, Homelander already testing the waters by making your children play together. Maybe it was your survival mechanism ill-timing but your mind desperately demanded a distraction, your lips were still able to taste peppermint, so your mind wandered south– possibly because that golden belt buckle was perfectly in your sight.
Frankly the last time you had a date was when Helena was five, they were cute, visited Lucci a couple times before asking for your number, the dates were great and the last time you had sex was with this guy before he dumped you, you thought they’ve potential and your wrist had taken enough abuse over the years– if anything you had given up your womanhood, too tired and focused with rearing lil’ Einstein to notice your needs, sleeping with this cutie wasn’t terrible but the moment the word “Freak” was uttered in reference to your kid– you were throwing their shit out the window. 
For the first time since she was born you found yourself not alone and supported, your friends had seen you like you carrier of pestilence affecting their jobs by virtue of association, your inability to find employment quickly burdened your friends and relatives, your family and yourself had not seen eye-to-eye for years, your relationship cracking deep enough to touch the abyss once you came home pregnant with no man behind you, then it was out the door after a couple weeks, even the kid didn’t appease them later down the track.
Could he really be relied on? Money was but a gesture of good will– covering for your kid for stealing maybe millions of dollars of god’s own spunk, and potentially getting your daughter acquitted for murder. Now that might be worth a blowie.
And he hurt your jaw quite graciously.
You looked up straight into his face, he had been talking for god knows how long without you noticing, and took his face.
Tasting like spearmint and iron, he was hesitant at first unsure if the timing was good but quickly relented as your tongue got more demanding, his hands now had no clue where to sit or what to touch but he let you take the lead. 
You tousled and pulled on his hair, wanting to get him close to you, to feel something good from him for once.
He pushed you lightly as he heard your daughter's steps encroaching, he stood up with a light blush on his ears as he pointed at the door, you looked up wanting to say something but there she was with a big grin on her face and her chest bouncing with excitement.
“You proud of yourself?” Did you ask her or yourself, there?-- If your friend dies…”
“Elmo won’t die… not on a microdose of V. for fuck sakes this company sold diluted V for a G-Fuel collab!”
“You say that but you had never actually worked with V until now! Do you have any idea what you were doing!?”
She looked at the desk nearby, the little GP office setting in this room sort of amusing.
“No. Got a little too eager when I found the playground, it’s sort of a cruel joke for me to be able to make myself invisible, and be in the same building as all of this” She gestured to her surroundings– just because I'm smart doesn’t mean I have the emotional intelligence of an adult to match… So?”
“Do whatever you want Helena… I can’t… I can’t with you… just–
Homelander turned to you, concerned at your tone, it was harsh. Where you giving up on her? He though.
You buried your face beneath your hands, trying to calm down.
“I won’t kill anybody, I'm not interested in that.”
“So what are you interested in?” You argue smacking your back flat on the back of the seat– please enlighten me!?”
“Vought.” Homelander interjects– oh you’re clever…”
He picks her up, poking her nose, there’s an air of comfort in his gesture, as if he always had done so.
“You're a scheming little munchkin.” he squeezes her cheeks jokingly– this isn’t Game of Thrones, darling. Daddy will take care of you”
“You mean the shareholders will take care of me once they realize you can re-open Stan Edgar’s plan to get into the US military… then the police force. Thanks to me.” She gives him a peck on the cheek– but don’t forget I’m not an only child.”
Homelander was blindsided by such a gesture, between you two he was in a tight spot.
Still he was entering heaven as his heart skipped a beat or two, feeling his daughter clung to him, feeling how dangerously light she was, how cute she was, how perfect she was.
Your daughter and yourself stayed silent during that drive home, the radio louder than usual, only when you reached your home did you act, stopping her belt-buckle from coming undone.
“You asked me to play a role in your game without a script– had to improvise.”
“Don’t give me that. You did something horrific Helena! I can't even believe you!” you snapped, your daughter frowned in return as you smacked your palms on the steering wheel– just admit you wanted to do it!”
“I did. I wanted to explore those labs. I like looking at things at Vought– it's stimulating! you want me to get “dad” to love me, no? He loves Vought! I'm just his bastard competing againts the son he’s loved for longer! so I show interest in the one thing he loves other than himself to have an advantage!”
“You went too far!!” you snapped.
“I am not sleeping in a car ever again, Y/N!!” She turned to you with rage in her sight– we are not going back! So you do your thing and I do my thing.”
You let go of her belt buckle.
“You hurt people.” you whispered, pain palpable in your lips, trying to not scream, to not slap her, to stay calm as your daughter heaved angrily, as her eyes glowed intensely.
“I haven’t– Elmo Cripple is alive… so far the only one that’s been hurt is me!!”
She gritted her teeth, the air growing thin inside your old station wagon.
“What is ‘Poltergeist’ getting out of this? He’s not like you.” You didn’t want to argue with her, afraid you would forget she was a child and not a woman– What have you done to him?”
“He’s a dog… don’t worry… he understands I have a vision– I need you to get Homelander to publicly acknowledge me as his daughter.”
Helena hopped off the car slamming the door on her way out.
Your daughter and yourself didn’t speak for the rest of the day, she silently did her thing with only the sounds of the television filling the gap, until bedtime– you sat outside with a cup of hot chocolate in your hands, you glanced at the potted trees and the smooth gray walls of your homely prison, large windows framing your reflection allowing you to catch the blue and red coming down in the glass unsurprisingly.
“You want some hot chocolate?” You asked, lifting your cup.
He looked disgusted at the idea.
“She’s sleeping… I am calling in sick tomorrow… I need a day off…” you muttered as he landed before you, he pushed the metal chair scraping the grass, to take a seat by your side.
“How are you feeling? They will be trying her formula, so she will be there under Dr. Park vigilance… talk about cool after-school activities-- beats being a girl-scout!.” Homelander was clearly not that interested in you tonight– I kept an eye on Poltergeist. All his vital signs are fine.”
You seemed a little relieved.
Gawking at him, his bleached blonde locks, those sharp features and beautiful thin lips, you felt a tingle in your chest.
You wanted to forget about today, to not think of Helena’s actions.
Your smile was sad but he hadn’t noticed.
“Wanna fuck?” You put the cup down with a huff.
Homelander gave you a double take, this was the easiest way to wash away today’s events-- Helena's words creeping back at you... you had to to bind him to you... like this you could rid of these strange sensations simmering within, as you stared at his pretty blue eyes, and his belt, you threw away rationale.
“My battery ran out.”
His nervous smile was cute, you stood up… him still in the chair– turning around once again as you opened the door, inviting him to enter your domain.
Homelander was still so handsome it was infuriating to acknowledge that. Compared to your dull exhausted skin– he was still so fine. It wouldn’t be the worst you’ve done, you missed the attention, and he wanted yours so why not? You scratched your head as he simply stood frozen on the spot, shrugging your shoulders as you closed the door behind– only for his hand to keep it open, his breath ragged and the blush in his cheek matching the faint light of his eyes.
“Are… Are you sure?” he asked nervously.
“John” You tap his chest with your knuckles– take it off.”
Bells rang inside his brain, a shimmering perturbed gaze burning directly at you– a dog awaiting orders.
He followed you into the living room ditching his boots and tights on the way to that terrible couch, he watched you closely as you took a blanket and threw it on the ground alongside the cushions, licking his lip as you took your shirt off revealing your bare breasts.
He was quick to take you into his arms, kissing you intensely, your hands reaching after his neck, fingers harshly caressing his undercut, as he slid down your bottoms.
“You miss me?” His hands were so needy as he bit into your neck leaving trails of hickeys, his tongue savoring that spot where he had marked you as his own, the dents in your skin and the sunken discolored flesh left by his bite mark– it tickles…” 
In the heat of the moment he had bitten you, feasting on your blood as pleasure and pain intertwined, your mind blank as he made love to you, fostering a hatred for mirrors after it all ended, feeling him kiss his signature made you anxious, not wanting to relieve the bitter memories in this moment.
“Mommy…” He whispered as he returned to kiss and lick your neck– "It's been so long, mommy.” he said breathlessly.
“Is been long for me too, my sweet boy.” He moaned into your skin, his maws needy, eager to taste you, his breathless soughs turning you light as he brought you down onto the floor, holding your head as he kissed your neck and ears– you promise to make mommy feel good just like I taught you, baby?” Your voice is sickly sweet making his eyes flare up.
“Can… Can mommy show me again?” His voice gravelly and low as he cupped your chest.
You wedged your legs from under him with a cheeky smile.
“I’ll be extra-thorough then, so pay attention, sweetie.”
He liked that tone in your voice, he liked it even more when you commanded him, how long had it been since you lead him? Too long... too long to bare another moment without it.
Unsurprisingly he had no need for a refresher.
Taglist-- @fromforeigntofamiliarity (hope you had a nice snack for this chapter :), @demodemo909 @immyowndefender
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gatorbites-imagines · 6 months ago
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hi !! if you’re cool with it, could we get an inbox check ? /nf ! i was just wondering if tumblr ate my ask. thank you ^__^ !!
hi anon, ive never done an inbox check before but ill try my best, check under the cut 🐊🌈
jason todd x cold hearted assasin male reader
dick grayson x soft dom reader
clone of anakin skywalekr x officer male reader
dick grayson getting eaten out
roronoa zoro and portgas d ace + sounding
moon knight boys x summer-like reader
slashers with a reader whos more out of pocket than they are
yandere mark grayson headcanons
sinister invincible being obsessive/lovesick with top reader
nolan grayson or allen x small but strong reader
rex splode x gnc trans male reader
sukuna x small and chubby ftm reader
mark grayson x john constantine-like reader
immortal x immortal reader
platonic shopping trip with the mauler twins (ftm reader)
nsfw alphabet with mark grayson
more bane x transmasc reader headcanons
homelander reacting to his partners self harm scars
lazy morning sex with roronoa zoro (ftm reader)
mark grayson sparring with his superhero partner
nolan grayson relationship headcanons
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0rah-s · 6 months ago
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Is it ok if you do a oliver aiku x black chubby reader friends to lover sorta thing pls🙏
*•° falling for a womanizer?
*•° Poor you...
*•° You're in for a ride.
*•° You both probably where in some shop at the same time and there he saw you for the first time.
*•° He was absolutely smitten.
*•° you were absolutely gorgeous??
*•° In all you form and essence you were perfect.
*•° As you were about to check out your cart, he rushes to you and pays with his contactless before you have the time to process anything.
*•° "?" Was your exact face at that time. But who could blame you - this random (cute) guy rushed half the store to pay for your shopping and was now leaning on the counter with a satisfied smirk.
*•° "May i take this lovey one out?"
*•° Now you posed: this guy payed for your shopping so you could go on a date with him as a thank you, but you didn't ask for him to so he isn't entitled to anything from you.
*•° After 2 second of reflection you came to the conclusion that you'd give him a date *he's cute af why wouldn't you?
*•° You kindly smile at him.
"Sure"
*•° He didn't show it outside but he was overjoyed - the cutest person on earth agreed to go out with him! It's as if he had forgotten that he could have gotten anyone be wanted.
*•° On the date you realised that you had much more in common that expected: you shared similar world views yet had such different perspectives to bring to one another; you liked similar baked goods and restaurants. You both enjoyed the quality conversation so much so that you decided to stay friends.
*•° you quickly lost nicesties and got comfortable with eachother, and got on a first name basis with eachother. He'd lend you his oversised clothing which all coincidentally fit like a glove, and you'd bring him food from your homeland.
*•° You were there for eachother when times mattered and had the healthiest relationship could be.
*•° Until one caught feelings...
*•° He did. And how could he not?
*•° The adoration in his eyes when your skin glowed under the kisses of the sun. The butterfly in his stomach when your lips would form a half crescent when smiling. Just that feeling when you're near him.
*•° But he kept it in, he didn't want to ruin the relationship he had built with you. For the first time he had a genuine friendship with a person he was attracted to, someone so sweet, he couldn't ruin that.
*•° You liked him too, if that wasn't obvious enough.
*•° eons of pining later changes happen...
*•° You start overthinking the relationship, he was sending in so many mixed signal you were beggining to lose yourself. You desided to get it out, regardless of how this will affect your friendship with Oliver, you simply didn't deserve those sleepless night pondering on an answer.
*•° You call him over to your place in a serious tone, you made him anxiously
*•° Then the confession.
*•° ??
*•° His face btw
*•° He couldn't belive you liked him too, its as if the fact that he was a famous, rich and handsome footballer had be ejected out of his mind.
*•° After the happy news, he doesn't waste a second to hold your hand and bring his face close to yours.
*•° Stupid grin plastered on his face.
*•° He laughs in the crook of you neck and hugs your form tight ever so exited at the new stage of your relationship.
*•° You officially got together and wether or not you decided to make it public (taking the risk of beinf desimated by his fans or hated by his ex's) or private, this bundle of flirt will respect his decision.
*•° You're both a great fit for eachother, keep him on earth will you?
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callsigncrash · 2 years ago
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Callsigncrash’s Masterlist!
This is just some rules and whatnot for requesting plus my works themselves. Enjoy!
________________________
Tokyo Ghoul
Naki
Yamori and Naki HCs
Small Boyfriend HCs
S/O Feeling Depressed HCs
S/O Drawing on Them
S/O Spoiling Them
S/O Who’s Taller/Protective
Sleepy S/O
Birthday HCs
Moomin HCs
Mimicry HCs
Unorthodox Affections
Drunk/High S/O
Buggin Out
Bloody Lovely
Choreographed Dance HCs
The Profanities Mean I Love You
S/O With Piercings
Deceivingly Strong S/O
Matching Hair HCs
Your Closet is My Closet
OCD HCs
Autistic S/O
NSFW HCs
Nightmares
Anxiety Disorders
Hot Days
Barbie or Oppenheimer
Silk Dancing
CCG S/O
Yamori (Jason)
Oomori HCs
2am Fic
Yamori and Naki HCs
Yamori with a TransMasc!Reader
Small Boyfriend HCs
S/O Feeling Depressed HCs
S/O Drawing on Them
S/O Spoiling Them
S/O Who’s Taller/Protective
Sleepy S/O
Birthday HCs
Moomin HCs
Mimicry HCs
Unorthodox Affections
Romantic Avoidance
Cosmic Darling
“Mother of pink!”
“Can you repeat that?”
Chubby S/O Getting Picked Up HCs
Lasting Experience
Drunk/High S/O
Buggin Out
Bloody Lovely
Choreographed Dance HCs
The Profanities Mean I Love You
Crystalline
Deceivingly Strong S/O
Matching Hair HCs
Your Closet is My Closet
OCD HCs
Autistic S/O
Nightmares
Hot Days
Silk Dancing
CCG S/O
________________________________________________
The Boys
Black Noir
Supe!Reader
S/O Drawing on Them
Birthday HCs
Moomin HCs
Mimicry HCs
Chubby S/O Getting Picked Up HCs
OCD HCs
Barbie or Oppenheimer
Homelander
S/O Drawing on Them
Birthday HCs
Chubby S/O Getting Picked Up HCs
Buggin Out
Deceivingly Strong S/O
OCD HCs
Autistic S/O
Nightmares
Hot Days
Barbie or Oppenheimer
________________________________________________
The Ice Cream Man/Art Brut
Please refer to my other blog @lactoseandsuffering for those.
________________________________________________
Community
Abed
Mimicry HCs
Barbie or Oppenheimer
________________________________________________
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Ben
S/O Drawing on Them
Barbie or Oppenheimer
________________________________________________
Murder, She Wrote
Grady Fletcher
S/O Spoiling Them
Birthday HCs
Deputy Floyd
Jeff Ogden
Woody Perkins
________________________________________________
Mononoke (2007)
Sasaki Hyouei
Unorthodox Affections
________________________________________________
The Exorcist
Father Francis
Father Francis HCs SFW/NSFW
Anxiety Disorders
A Day Off with Father Francis
________________________________________________
Rules!
I try to be pretty lenient but here’s what I have so far.
Requests: Open!
What I won’t write: Weird kinks (i.e “bathroom stuff”, ddlg, and things of that nature), character x character, underage, noncon, and just things that I’m not comfortable with.
What I will write: I can do nsfw, platonic or romantic things, marriage, maybe pregnancy stuff (no birth things), bloody stuff, and just about anything else. I’m not too crazy on restrictions.
—————————————————————————————————————
Taglist!
If anyone wants to be tagged on specific fics feel free to ask!
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saiyanprincessswanie · 4 years ago
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SaiyanPrincessSwanie - Reading List Week 18
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Hey all, it’s time to bring you week 18 of my reading list. These are all one-shots, drabbles and stories from authors who have either tagged me in their work or they have been recommended to me. Every week, I will put a list together of what I’m reading. I want to do this to help spread  the love in the Marvel Community.
If you would like to be added, signal boosted, please tag me in your fics or tag me in someone else’s stories. If you don’t see your story listed it’s probably due to my  cut  off date I had earlier in the week or Tumblr might have eaten your  tagged story. All stories not listed that I did receive will be featured on the  following week. Completed series that I’m tagged in will take longer for me to get through but please still tag me.  
This week was crazy as I was tagged a lot due to Kinktober! I had over 60 fics this week. Please be kind and patient as I continue to make my way through all tags.
Make sure you read the warnings on every story. They range from dark to fluff.
These  will be listed in no particular order. None of these stories are mine.  I’m just signal boosting them. Author is listed next to title.
Page break made by @whimsicalrogers​​​
If you can please reblog these lists so they can reach more people on Tumblr.
~Missy  💜
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Nowhere to run - @sagechanoafterdark​
Midnight in the Garden of Evil - @jtargaryen18​
Alluring - @nano--raptor​
Kinktober Day 22: Homelander - @nellblazer​
Kinktober Day 22: Steve Rogers - @sweeterthanthis​ 
The dress stunt - @tuiccim​
Ransom overstimulation drabble - @navybrat817​
Safe word - @stargazingfangirl18​
Burning desire - @feliciahardyn​
Rose Red’s All Hallows Eve: Shall we go inside - @sweater-daddiesdumbdork​
Blanket Monster - @drabblewithfrannybarnes​
Bucky’s nighttime meal - @angrythingstarlight​
Have you any wool - @threeminutesoflife​
Envious lover - @charmed-asylum​
Kinktober Day 23: Loki - @nellblazer​
Innocence Chp 16 - @extremelyblackandwhite​
Stuck between a rock and a hard d*** - @ozarkthedog​
Kinktober Day 23: Bucky Barnes - @sweeterthanthis​
Little lamb - @drabblewithfrannybarnes​
Hostage Situation - @tuiccim​
The best worst holidays part 1 - @nekoannie-chan​
Kinktober Day 24: Papa Midnite - @nellblazer​
Dance with me - Part 2 - Part 3 -  @drabblewithfrannybarnes​
Puppy love - @drabblewithfrannybarnes​
Hold me closer - @sagechanoafterdark​
Hit and Run - @navybrat817​
Kinktober Day 24: Ransom Drysdale - @sweeterthanthis​
So warm, it’s hot - @tuiccim​
Tiktok text - @tuiccim​
Kinktober Day 25: Valkyrie - @nellblazer​
In the hot seat - @jobean12-blog​
Come closer - @sagechanoafterdark​
Tainted - @donutloverxo​
Kinktober Prompt 13: Andy Barber - @stargazingfangirl18​
Andy Barber drabble - @ozarkthedog​
Kinktober Day 26: Hannibal - @nellblazer​
Kinktober Day 22: Chubby Bucky - @propertyofpoeandbucky​
Habits and kinks - @tuiccim​
The taming of the shrew - @holylulusworld​
Sibling Rivalry - Chp 23 - @imdarkinme​
Feed or fuck - @caffiend-queen​
Dishes with the bae - @drabblewithfrannybarnes​
Kinktober Day 26: Andy Barber - @sweeterthanthis​
It’s not gonna spank itself - @tuiccim​
Home sweet home: catch ‘em - @sweater-daddiesdumbdork​
Kinktober Day 27: Eric Draven - @nellblazer​
Hidden in plain sight - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - @holylulusworld​
Silent words - Chp 4 - @indecisivedolly​
Kinktober Day 27: Bucky Barnes - @sweeterthanthis​
Edges of a God - @tuiccim​
Retirement Plan - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - @hevans-angel​
Can you hear that jingle jangle? - @drabblewithfrannybarnes​
Watch - @donutloverxo​
Coercion and Haven Chp 6 - @inlovewiththefictionalcharacters​
Kinktober Day 28: Lucifer Morningstar & Mazikeen - @nellblazer​
Mr Freezy drabble - @ozarkthedog​
Silent words Chp 5 - @indecisivedolly​
Kinktober Day 28: Stucky - @sweeterthanthis​
Cut and thrust - @tuiccim​
Sharpening knives - @nano--raptor​
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writing-for-the-gays · 3 months ago
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Call for beta readers! If you're a homelander fucker and you happen to be trans masc and also super mentally ill I call apon thee!
I've got a fic in the works that needs to be beta read, I already have one beta reader but I need an Xtra one
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prismatic-starstuff · 3 years ago
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My brain has immediately gone blank uhhhhhh uhhhhhh uhhhhhhhhh it's a tossup between Mohg, Morgott, and Godfrey but I have exactly zero (0) scenarios in the brain rn so go ham with whatever I guess, I love everything you write so no matter what you do it'll be good :D
Warriors.
— gender-neutral!Reader x Godfrey/Hoarah Loux.
The ringing of metal against metal, your greatsword against his axe, is almost loud enough to deafen; drowned out solely by the pounding of your heart in your ears. The weapons strain against each other, neither side giving even an inch, before the two of you are finally pushed back by the sheer force of your strength.
His eyes are devoid of grace, yet they shine radiant as they meet yours; with passion, with fervour, with the pure thrill of battle.
You can't help but feel a smile tug at your lips.
How good it feels, to clash with a fellow warrior at last.
------
Hoarah Loux is a formidable fighter, that much is undeniable; but after your initial meeting on the battlefield, you found that he was also a most charming fellow... and a most wonderful partner. As his arm rests comfortably around your shoulders, his expression warm and tender, there is no sign of your past as enemies to be found.
"She looks to be healthy," he says of the sleeping infant in your arms, his free hand raising to so gently rest a finger against her chubby cheek. "Uninjured, as well."
Your breathing has finally slowed to a regular rate, and your body leans into his own, seeking the comfort of his warmth. Defending the village from attack had been fair and well... but when you'd realised there was a baby left alone in one of the houses, and the raiders were heading straight for her, the fear had kicked in immediately; and even now, it hadn't quite dissipated fully.
Gazing down at her sleeping form, her head so easily cradled by Hoarah's hand, you feel your heart swell with pride in the little one.
To survive such an ordeal and sleep so soundly after... She, too, must be quite the warrior.
------
Nepheli is sparring with the other children, her skills with the wooden sword truly admirable for her age. At your side, you catch a glimpse of Hoarah's fond smile; an expression of parental pride that perfectly matches the feeling blooming in your heart.
Attacks on the village from rival groups still come as frequently as they ever did, and people of your own former homeland still come now and then to make a useless attempt at convincing you to return. Every day, the sun rises with the ominous potential of danger from any angle; a threat that's felt infinitely weightier ever since your daughter came into your lives.
But, as you see the pride in your partner's eyes, and the strength in your daughter's strikes... you know you'll all make it through.
You are warriors, after all.
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blindmagdalena · 9 months ago
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Hello I hope you’re doing well but I do have a quick question, I haven’t been on your blog in like forever but I remember you were/are writing like a 3 part fic of homelander x chubby reader nd I can’t find it
Jst wondering! And again hope you’re doing well!!
hi darling! sounds like it's Guilty Pleasures you're thinking of. 🖤
i'm sorry to everyone who has been waiting for part 3. my mental health hiatus from writing has been entirely unwitting, and i desperately hope to come back from it soon.
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staywillalwaysstay · 2 years ago
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Imperfections make Us Perfect
Disclaimer: This fic has nothing to do with the character of the Idol or any person mentioned. It is purely fictional and meant for entertainment purposes only. Based on the incident of my relative.
Genre: Lee Felix x chubby!reader, summer au, mention of dehydration and fainting, insecure reader, lovely bf felix
Summary: The stereotypical view of the society made you insecure about your weight. Being chubby and curvy doesn't mean being ugly, which you were unable to understand. Thus, your boyfriend, Felix, takes this responsibility and teaches you to love yourself and prioritize yourself.
If I've done any mistake, left out something, your opinions about the story, please comment in the comment section and if you have some suggestions, you can tell me via ask always and I'll try to respond each one of it.
Dehydration is a harmful reduction in the amount of water in the body. Please, drink lots of water and avoid being in the heat for too long.
The symptoms of dehydration are:
feeling thirsty.
dark yellow and strong-smelling pee.
feeling dizzy or lightheaded.
feeling tired.
a dry mouth, lips and eyes.
peeing little, and fewer than 4 times a day
Tumblr media
It was mid-summer and the scorching heat seemed to absorb all your energy, and you and your boyfriend were dumb enough to take a walk to the pool instead of using your car, petrol prices you know. You were sweating profusely, practically bathed in your own sweat, looking like a hot mess. On the other hand, your boyfriend, Felix, whose homeland was a tropical country didn't mind it as much. He was definitely worried seeing you on the verge of dehydration. Finally being done with your stubborn ass he said, "Babe, you know that we're not far from our house right..", You nodded affirmatively. "How about we go home and get you in some shorts and a cotton shirt? Moreover, we have our couple outfits right, how about we try them, hmm...". You could never deny Felix's requests, what come may, but today you did. "Bokkie~! I think I like my outfit, and once we reach home, I wouldn't like to go out again, try to understand babe!!" "But...*sighs*, at least drink some water, at the rate you're sweating at, you'll get dehydrated soon." "Oh, let me check it. Shit! I guess I forgot to carry a bottle of water along with me. Sorry!", you rambled while finding for a bottle in your bag, sadly finding none. "Why are you so careless,*sighs* let me get you a bottle of water from the store nearby, wait under the tree."
You were already wearing a full sleeve t-shirt under your half sleeve blouse, and a ankle length wide pants, to hide your body. Your clothing made it harder to survive under the beaming sun. Each passing minute your vision begun to blur and your eyes getting shut, your ears almost shutting the sound of the surroundings, your legs failing to support you, thus, your system had begun to shut down, your voice didn't leave your throat. The contents of the bag spilt around the place, the sunglasses lay broken near you, the world turned dark and silent, your body lay flat across the footpath. Maybe, you should've worn airy clothes.
There was a lady, in the store who kept bargaining with the owner for a discount, wasting his time and increasing his stress. In the end, Felix had to beg her to move away from the billing counter due to an emergency. As soon as he started to approach you, he witnessed a large crowd standing on the same place as you where you were waiting. He tried to shovel the public behind to witness the scene, just to find his better half laying unconscious on the footpath. "Call the ambulance, somebody, PLEASE call the ambulance. Baby,*pats your cheeks*, shit!" At that moment a doctor comes to the rescue fighting through the crowd. "wait for a minute sir!", the doctor said, kneeling down, "can we take her in the shop, she'll feel a bit cooler." He removed your socks, your scarf, loosened your belt and collar, and splashed some water on your face, while laying you on your back. "Let her take her time to wakeup, this'll reduce further chances of fainting. Once she wakes up, make sure she gets hydrated. Don't worry young man, this is common in summers." "Thank you...thank you so much sir!! I'll make sur to follow your instructions. I lost my senses due to panic and fear. How should I repay you for your kindness?!" Felix rambled through his emotions. "My pleasure young man. But next time if anybody faints position the person on their back. If there are no injuries and the person is breathing, raise the person's legs above heart level — about 12 inches (30 centimeters) — if possible. Loosen belts, collars or other constrictive clothing. To reduce the chance of fainting again, don't get the person up too quickly, alright. You don't need to pay me back, it's my duty as a doctor. Take care, bye!"
The world seemed blurry, you felt cool, and you found your self in an unknown place once you woke up. You also realized that you were laying on Felix's lap all this while. Worried you said, "Shit! Jagi are your legs paining. I'm sorry I didn't know.....wait a minute. Why am I here? What happened? Babe..." Your boyfriend on the other hand looked at you sadly, he cupped your face, ran his hand through your hair, and exclaimed, "You fainted due to dehydration, and this was the nearest store where I could bring you to cool you down. And, no my legs aren't tired of you sleeping on them, it's just I'm tired of you berating yourself. Now, let's go home, you need some rest." "But...what about our pool picnic. I'm sorry I rui-" That's all it took for Felix to place a kiss on your lips. "Now gorgeous, do you want to go home or-....", he whispered. "Lets go home!!" you said, as your cheeks turned red. As soon as you woke up, he took your hands in his and started walking out of the shop, thanking the owner, to which she replied, "Ah gwaenchanh-ayo! Take care of yourselves in the future. You look so good together." "Thank you!" you two said to the owner together and left for home. Mostly, Felix carrying you home, despite your denial.
The heat still as bad as before had now exhausted you're boyfriend, panting, and sweating. Yet he went to bring a glass of water for both of you. Seeing this, your tears started to flow down your cheeks. Your insecurities, the thoughts of him leaving you, him being tired of handling the insecurities of a chubby girlfriend, started occupying your mind. By the time you could say somethin, Felix arrived there with a glass of water. Your tears worrying him, leading him to think he had done a mistake. "Babe! What's wrong? Did I do something wrong? I just carried you here as I didn't want you to get unconscious on the way. I'm sorry, babe, please don't cry. I promise to make up to you." he kept on rambling apologies while hugging you, waiting until you stop crying. "Felix, what did I do to deserve you?" to which Felix frowned, "Huh!?""You're such a caring and loving boyfriend, you're so loyal, you never commented on my wait, you make me feel beautiful, and the list goes on. I...I-I ruined your public image, my weight kept on bothering my thoughts making me jealous of every single girl I see you with. You have to handle the burden of a larger gf, my insecurities, and etc. etc. etc. And-" Felix was teary himself. He kissed your tears away, kissed your temples, your forehead and every inch of your face, kissing you deeply on the lips. He went down on his knees so that he could see your face. "look at me babe! Do you think I'm perfect? No, right. All of us have certain strengths and weaknesses. I have them too. It's true your not prefect, but it is also true that you have strong points as well. Our imperfections make us perfect for each other. We accepted each other, because we love all of our qualities and imperfections. We love each other, and that's what is important." he made you stand up and tagged you along to the mirror of your bedroom, and back-hugged you. "See! Look at your eyes, look at the love in your eyes, look at your smile, then look at me. Look at the smile you bring to my face, the joy of having you as my partner, look in my eyes. Now look at the mirror, don't we look perfect for each other?!" "We do babe! I feel elegant in your touch. I love you!" He turned you to face him and kissed you deeply, making you feel his love, making you smile against his lips. He's right you fit in each other arms perfectly, you're lips fit together like the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. You belong to him, and he belongs to you. "Now, I need to talk to you after we freshen up. Shower?" "Yessie~" you chuckled, making you look adorable, lighting Felix's eyes.
After a loooonnngggg~~~~ shower makeout session, Felix was ready to preach. " You know that the temperature outside is almost 40* then why did you wear such long clothes? You were dressed like it was winters going on. Next, do not forget to take a water bottle while going out, why don't you understand even after telling this a 100 times before? Lastly, stop being a miser, we both earn enough to fulfill the petrol prices for our cars, instead of walking in the heat. And, please drink water, you always forget to drink water and eat your food properly, else you'll get weak, understood?!" "Ne sonnim~~". "Let me find out your summer clothes in your wardrobe." "Babe-" *2 hours later* "You don't have a single summer clothing?!*sighs* We're going to shop you some better clothes in the evening, DON'T make faces!" "Yeoboo~~! There's no sale going on-" "I'll find one, that's it." "But they wouldn't flatter my body-" "Woman if you don't love your body, let me adore it atleast." Felix's gaze alone made you feel flattered, and how could you deny his request, he was your love afterall. You two ended up buying a lot of clothes, with you two bargaining to pay. Hence, you had to split the bill between you two.
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artistgoudeau · 3 years ago
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Wish Fulfillment “Do-Over” NSFW!!! NOT FOR MINORS!!!
So this is my idea for a long fiction I want to do that’s mostly my own wish fulfillment. What do you guys think? I’ve already started writing but it’s in the drafts stage.
Everyone x fem y/n (platonic)
Erwin x Reader x Levi x Miche x Hange (romantic)
Black/brown skinned (4c hair)
Chubby/curvy y/n (in the beginning)
Big booty y/n (just cause)
Huge Blerd (big AOT fan but has other fandoms)
Is a well of random knowledge thanks to YouTube
Has attended college
Has a smart mouth/ snarky personality
Smoke weed every day!
Y/n is an average millennial with a big heart and a hopeful outlook on life despite dealing with depression and anxiety herself. She is average in body proportions (for American women) but has a curvy body. As the story progresses, Y/n will have changes in her body that’s one would expect from going from an average American diet, to nearly starving and exercising to keep up with actual soldiers. Y/n genuinely believes in love and goodness but will be tested through this harsh reality of AOT.
curses, wears revealing/tight clothes (for the era), depressed, has generalized anxiety, confident and self loving, but makes self deprecating/inappropriate jokes, loves colors, loves animals, loves guitar & piano (avg player), isn’t a singer but loves to sing, isn’t a dancer but loves to dance, can cook (cause duh),
Main goal: change the ending of the series by helping everyone survive and freeing the founding Titan and establishing world peace
Y/n loves/likes most of the characters and is working to help them survive and find happiness
Not intentionally seducing any character, but most/all characters ending up adoring y/n
I plan on keeping y/n on the same path of love and peace throughout the story but they will absolutely have changed characteristics
Start- optimistic but not naive/not a leader/not confident in physical ability to kill to survive/kind/creative/smart mouth/aave/hides emotions (poorly)/wears her heart on her sleeve/crybaby
End- still optimistic/smart mouthed/kind/creative/becomes a leader/becomes nearly fearless/still crybaby/aave
“Last time I checked I was grown”
“And boom goes the dynamite”
“Kiss the fattest part of my ass!”
“Ni -hnghmmm- boy…”
“You have five seconds to get the fuck out of my way...4”
“All dogs are puppies”
“But is that a LAW or more of a guideline?”
“I’m not sure about murder, but I will stab you in the eyes.”
“What the FUCK did you just call me?”
Levi: “hey fatass.” Y/n: “hey shortass.”
“I don't know what I can do to get you to trust me, but I swear, the only thing I want is to see humanity do more than just survive. I want you all to truly live.”
“This isn’t life. This is ugly and cruel. And the worst part is that it doesn’t HAVE to be. The world is cruel because PEOPLE made it that way. Life could be heaven on earth if we all decided to change.”
“I’m not a killer. Hell, compared to everyone here, I’ve lived like royalty. But that doesn’t mean I haven’t felt pain, or loss. It doesn’t mean I don’t have a heart.”
“My family,…my friends,...everything gone.”
“*sob* no one knows where I am! *sob* I can’t even tell anyone I’m okay.”
“FUCK YOU! I AM ALONE! Everything and everything I have ever known is completely out of my reach! I have never been more alone in my life! I have nothing! *sob* so fuck you…”
“Why me? It could’ve been anyone! Someone useful! I’m just a regular ass person! Why ME?!”
“Please tell me that y’all use seasoning in your food.”
“It’s your world, I’m just living in it.”
“Deez nuts.”
“That’s what she said.”
“Lay one fucking finger on me and you will lose your entire fucking hand.”
“Does this look like a fucking petting zoo?!”
“You do the right thing even when it’s hard. That’s how I know you’re a good person.”
“Just another day in the survey corps! Hehehehe!”
Makes constant references to modern era jokes/memes and laughs at them to herself.
“Stupid is as stupid does.”
Sees Titan out of nowhere: “Wha-Oh Fuck! Shit! BITCH!!!!”
“My ancestors were taken from their homelands and made into slaves in a foreign land. They lost their freedom, cultures, families, everything. 400+ years later I break bread w/ the descendants of those slave owners and I do not hold resentment towards them. Don’t get me wrong, there are times where I want vengeance and blood. But I’m 400+ years, the descendants of those slaves proved over and over again that we are not the animals they thought us to be. And it’s not perfect by any means. Because of the color of my skin, I could be killed, discriminated against and brutalized. But my people persevered. We came together and fought to be free. We created a culture unique to us that the entire world sees. And we still fight, until a day comes where the color of someone’s skin, their sex, gender, size shape, etc. are not ever used against them again. And I still believe that world is achievable.”
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bts-hyperfixation · 4 years ago
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The Princess and The Duke – Part 1
Duke!Namjoon x Princess!reader
I know I said this wasn’t going to be out until Friday, but after the Scammys, I thought I’d put it out today! This has not yet been edited.
Warnings - future smut, allusions to smut.
The first time you met you were six months old. Barely aware you existed, let alone there was a whole world existing around you. Namjoon was two at the time. A chubby little toddler clinging desperately to his mother as he tried to hide away from all the other strange people in the room. Most of the kingdom had turned out for your christening, so obviously the future Duke’s family had also made an appearance. They stood with the rest of the court at the front of the church, most of the adults attempting to corral children of their own instead of watching the Princess’ baptism.
It was only when a shrill cry echoed through the church hall that Namjoon looked up from his mother’s shoulder trying to locate the noise. Turned out you didn’t appreciate being dipped into freezing cold holy water. From then on, he’d watched intently, each movement made by the priest and your family, craning his neck to watch you wiggle in the queen’s arms. You were just so small, and so pink. He liked pink, and you were wrapped in piles of pink lace. He knew these were traditional colours for your kingdom, his mom liked to tell him stories about the pink flowers that grew throughout his homeland. Beautiful pink daisies. They were his favourite bedtime stories.
Stories of a brave king leading his army into battle. Each week he would send home a bouquet of the only flower that grew on the battlefield. Each week the queen would know he was okay, until one week they didn’t arrive. For the next few days, the queen was inconsolable, after that she was catatonic. She sat draped in black watching the last of the pink daisies wither. As the last petal fell from the shrivelled bud, a shout was heard throughout the kingdom. The king had returned, enemies slain, and with him he brought as many flowers as the cavalry could carry. The seeds were planted throughout the country, and those were the same flowers that remained to this day. The flowers that were lining the pews of the church, and the ballroom at the palace.
After the christening, members of the court were invited for a meal and to meet the infant princess, to meet you. The banquet was held in the ballroom, a long table adorned with wreaths and favours for each of the guests. You were placed in a cradle close to the king. A place where all could visit to pay their respects and your father could protect you. Once his family had finished their meal, they visited your crib, offering a gift and paying their respects to the royals. Namjoon tugged at his mother’s dress until she lifted him to get a better look. As he peered into the cot, he was shocked to find you staring straight up at him. Other babies he met always seemed to be asleep, but not you.
He wriggled in the duchess’ arms until he could reach you. The room fell silent as he extended his chubby hand to poke at your own curled fist. No one outside of your family, the priest, and the doctors had dared to touch you yet. They waited with bated breath for a response from the king. Little Namjoon paid no attention to the eyes on him, too focused on you. Your small fingers wrapped their way around his. The king had cooed at the event, closely followed by everyone else in the room.
The next time you met Namjoon properly you were four, he was almost six. You’d been allowed outside to play with the other children of the court. The problem was, many of them were considerably older than you. None of the ‘big’ girls wanted to play silly little girl games. So you sat alone and watched them as they made daisy chains together. You tried to copy them from afar, but your pudgy little fingers wouldn’t cooperate, ripping through the stems instead of creating the holes needed to thread more flowers.
Namjoon had been following around the gardener when he saw you. Decapitated daisies lay by the dozen around your feet. He couldn’t bear to see the carnage continue, so he took pity on you. He picked a flower with a thick enough stem and passed it too you. To say you were thrilled was an understatement. You’d taken the flower excitedly and threaded another through before giving it back to him to make another hole. The two of you had then spent the next half hour together, him piercing stems and you threading them into long chains. He laughed as you concentrated. Your tongue stuck out of the side of your mouth as you focused on the task at hand.
When you decided the chain was long enough, he made one last hole so you could form a circle. With the ring complete you stepped on your tippy toes to place it over his head, nodding in approval as the string draped from his neck to his knees. He looked down, assessing his new accessory and beamed a smile back at you. The first time you ever saw his dimples. Immediately you were compelled to poke them. He didn’t stop you as you reached for his cheek, instead laughing so they deepened.
You weren’t like any princess he had seen in his books. Those princesses were graceful and dainty. You were more like a bull in a china shop. Honestly, he was relived. All the other boys were in high school, they had no time for him. And the girls all wanted him to play ‘prince charming’. It was fun playing with you. You’d run around the gardens with him, dig in the mud, and exchange the stories your parents read at bedtimes.
Age six brought the loss of your first tooth. The tooth had been placed in a tissue under your pillow and the next morning it had become money! You had been so excited to tell Namjoon all about it, only for him to burst your bubble.
“The tooth fairy isn’t real Y/N” he’d stated matter-of-factly, his nose turned up at the notion.
“Is too!” you’d cried back petulantly. You’d seen her with your own two eyes. Well you’d been half asleep, and it was dark… but you were certain it had been her.
“Is not!” the eight-year-old boy retorted. “I’ll prove it! Next time you lose a tooth don’t tell nobody. She won’t come I promise.” He’d sounded so smug. You wanted to hit him. instead you set out to prove him wrong. You kept wiggling your teeth hoping one would come loose. It’s around a month later you get your chance. The tooth came out in the apple you were eating for dessert. Carefully you hid the bone from your nanny so she couldn’t tell your parents. After you were tucked in that night, you slid the bone under your pillow and waited for the fairy to visit you. But she never came.
The next day when you saw Namjoon, you were devastated, but still not ready to concede the fairy’s existence.  
“Maybe I upset her?” you sniffle at him “You’re not supposed to wait for her, I broke the rules! That’s why she didn’t come! What if she never visits me again?” tears fell freely down your face. Namjoon had never felt so guilty, not even when he lied about breaking his mom’s favourite vase. He had watched you cry for a moment, unsure of where to go from here. He had made the heir to the throne cry… could he get locked away for this?
“It’s my fault Y/N! I was just jealous” he quickly tried to formulate a believable story in his head as you wiped away your tears.
“Jealous?” your voice was small, a little hope filtering through the sadness.
“Yeah… jealous. See I… uh… I’ve nearly got all my big teeth now, so she doesn’t come to see me as often. I bet if you put the tooth under your pillow tonight and go to sleep, she will come!” your face had lit up at the news. Immediately after he’d said goodbye to you, he went and told the gardener about your tooth. When you woke up the next day, a shiny coin was in the tooth’s place. You’d held the discovery over Namjoon for the few months, but he didn’t care. He was just happy you were happy and that he didn’t get into trouble.
At age eight you were definitely not shaping up to be the perfect princess. In fact you were quite the rambunctious little tot. Your mother became more and more exasperated every time you turned up with a new grass stain on one of your best gowns. She begged you to spend more time having tea parties with the girls instead. It was never your fault though. The tea parties were dull and Namjoon would challenge you to a race through the maze, or to see who could climb highest in the trees. You couldn’t just let him win.
If you weren’t running around or rolling down hills, you were lying together staring up at the clouds from the middle of the topless bandstand in the middle of the maze. The beautiful white stone structure had quickly become ‘your’ spot. None of the other palace kids showed any interest in exploring the maze, and the adults always seemed to get lost trying to find you. Hours were wasted with the two of you just staring up at the sky, sometimes talking about your day, sometimes in complete silence. It was just nice to be with him.
On calmer days he would read aloud from a book while you made daisy chains. You could do it by yourself now. Much more in control of your own limbs than you used to be. The summer before Namjoon was due to go to high school you made a chain so long you could coil it around the entire base of the bandstand.
After he started high school, you saw a lot less of Namjoon. He wasn’t able to come around as often between his homework and extracurriculars. Instead you begged your father to let you attend his football games. Each Saturday you went in disguise with your nanny to watch Namjoon play, regardless of the weather. You weren’t even sure you enjoyed the sport, but it was worth it for the smile he flashed every time he found you amongst the onlookers.
Each week you wore a different disguise wanting to make it difficult for him, but each time he found you without fail.
You melted every time, knowing that smile was just for you. Originally you told yourself it was just a swell of pride, watching your best friend play. Eventually you had to admit to yourself that maybe it was more than that, but you swallowed the crush. After all he was in high school, he wouldn’t want a silly little girl like you anyway.
When you turned fourteen it was time to for you to be presented to the kingdom. A ball was thrown in your honour, the first of many you would attend in your lifetime. The thought of being alone at any big event made you feel queasy. The fact that this one was going to be focused entirely on you made you ill for an entire week before. Namjoon had spent the week trying to reassure you that everything was going to be fine. Luckily, your birthday had been during a break from school so he could spend the time with you. He grew more and more concerned as he watched your health deteriorating to a point where you could barely keep water down. Eventually he came to a decision and asked for an audience with the king himself.
He’d dressed in his best suit making sure not a single hair was out of place. He marched straight up to the double doors to your father’s study and took a deep breath, more than prepared to argue his point. Your father had welcomed Namjoon into his office with open arms. He’d always been fond of the boy, especially knowing the weak spot you held for him. Regardless of the warm reception and his original confidence in his idea, Namjoon felt the nerves begin to overtake him. He wiped his sweaty palms on the sides of his suit jacket, breath coming out shakily.
“Can I escort Y/N to her first ball.” The king had been taken aback by Joon’s sudden outburst, his face showing obvious surprise at the young man’s bold request. Namjoon mistook the expression for a dismissal and so, in a much less eloquent way than he had practiced in is shower, he fought his case.
“Y/N has been ill all week; she doesn’t think she can do this alone…. And I just thought… maybe she would be okay if I were with her. I know I’m only a duke, but I just want her to be okay and I really think this would be good and it’ll only be for this one ball and…” Namjoon’s rambling came to an end when your father raised his hand. Namjoon clenched his fists as he waited for an answer.
Your father had taken his time to consider Namjoon’s proposal, enjoying the way the boy had squirmed under his gaze. To this day, Namjoon refers to it as the second most terrifying day of his life. Eventually a smile had broken over the kings face, no longer able to contain his laugh. He clapped Namjoon on the shoulder and sent him off with his blessing.
On his way to meet you in the gardens afterwards, he had gathered the prettiest daisies he could find. He found you lying on the floor of the bandstand, looking a little too pale as you stared up at the clouds floating past. He cleared his throat on arrival, making you look at him with the offer of a weak smile, not really taking him in.
When he didn’t take his place beside you, you’d sat up to look at him properly. That’s when you saw the pinstripe suit and quaffed hair. It looked so unlike him you couldn’t help but giggle. Normally Joon was a t-shirt and basketball shorts kind of guy. He had rolled his eyes and extended his hand to help you up. You took it, every question in your mind had gotten stuck in your throat when his eyes had met yours. You never did get over that silly little crush. He didn’t release your hand like you expected him too. Instead he placed the bouquet into your free hand and asked you the question you’d been dreaming he would.
“Just to protect you of course… I don’t like when you aren’t well” He’d broken the moment by ruffling your hair, a sure sign he was doing this as a favour.
He took you to every ball you attended after that one.
The summer you turned seventeen was the summer before Namjoon left for university. You snuck out passed your guards in the night to see him. There was a very convenient secret passageway that led from your room to the gardens. You would meet him at the bandstand and talk until the sun came over the horizon. The lack of sleep had been worth it to spend those last fleeting days with him. You talked about anything and nothing, just like you would in the daytime, but this felt far more intimate.
The first time you convinced him to meet you after curfew his eyes flitted everywhere. Always nervous someone would find the two of you there and assume the worst. You on the other hand were just desperate to soak up as much of your friends company as you could before he left.
Over time he’d become more comfortable with the routine. In fact he had been certain that your sneaking around hadn’t even been that sneaky, your parents were just allowing you to rebel like this. Eventually he got used to walking you back to the entrance of the secret passageway, spending an extra few moments together.
His final night in town had been an emotional one. You’d sat side by side, your head on his shoulder staring up at the stars in complete silence for a long time. A tear fell down your cheek every time you thought about him leaving you. He’d wrapped an arm around you and pulled you close just as a shooting star arched across the sky. You immediately had a wish in mind. Eyes scrunched tight and fists clenched, you wished as hard as you could that he would stay, or at least that he’d come back fast. But unfortunately, he had to go, and morning came around far too fast.
You’d dragged your feet as he walked you back to the passageway. Shoulders bumping together, fingers brushing, glances stolen when you were sure the other wasn’t looking. The wall that concealed your entrance had come into view far too quickly. You’d sighed as you reluctantly pressed in the stones that would open the doorway, far from ready to say goodbye to the boy you’d grown up with. You hugged him goodbye, tears streaming freely down your face. You’d released him and turned to walk back into the castle, but as you’d taken that first step, he grabbed you sharply by the wrist and pulled you back to him.
His lips were so soft as they met yours. The surprise had knocked all the air out of your lungs forcing you to pull back sooner than you would’ve liked. He wiped the tears from your face and pulled you back to him, kissing you once more. And then he was gone.
The following autumn had dragged by. With no Namjoon, you had been forced to invest in the idle gossip of other members of the court, actually pay attention in your elocution lessons, and, perhaps worst of all, prepare for your first ball without your trusty escort. Every time you thought of Namjoon your lips tingled at the memory of your first kiss. You were devastated when his parents had told you he wouldn’t be able to make it home for the Christmas ball.
When the time came, you’d prepared for the ball like you had every other. A team came to pinch, primp, and style you to within an inch of yourself. This year they’d decided on a snow theme. Your pale blue ballgown had been the most beautiful one you’d worn at that point. It glittered like freshly fallen snow in the winter sun. The skirt poofed out around your waist and fell just above your feet so people could still see the matching shoes with little snowflakes. It was the best you thought you’d ever looked, and it broke your heart to know Namjoon wasn’t going to see you like that.
When the time came, you’d taken a breath and readied yourself for a night of refusing advances of handsy nobles, and questions you weren’t prepared to answer about the whereabouts of your usual date. You took a hold of the banister and began your entrance into the grand ballroom, desperately trying to keep your eyes forward and not trip at the same time. Whilst concentrating on not falling flat on your face, you had failed to notice one crucial detail about the room before you, until he took your hand and brought it to his lips. Namjoon had made it home after all.
You spent the entire event together. For every slow dance you were in the middle of the floor swaying together as he whispered sweet things in your ear. Time not on the dance floor had been spent laughing and catching up. The night came to an end with you escaping to your spot.
He’d picked a daisy and threaded it into your hair, trailing his fingers down the side of your face when he was finished. You’d boldly stepped even closer to him, lips inches away from his, daring him to repeat the night he left, and he’d gladly taken the opportunity.  He’d pulled you impossibly closer, lifting you on to your tiptoes and kissed you like a man starved. You’d wrapped your arms around his waist. Desperately trying to make up for lost time. Eventually you came to rest, foreheads resting against one another, breathing hard.
“Y/N I love you.” It was the first time he admitted it out loud, but it certainly wouldn’t be the last. In fact he said it at least twenty more times that night.
“I love you too Joon.” You kissed him one more time before taking his hand and breaking into a sprint. You came to a stop at the passageway to your chambers. “Come in with me?” You’d asked, flashing him doe eyes he had never been able to resist.
“Are you sure?” He brushed a stray hair behind your ear and met your eyes, you’d never seen him look so serious.
“Well I can’t get out of this dress alone.” You’d tried to joke. When his expression didn’t change you gulped down any reservations and nodded. “I’m completely sure.” He’d swept you into his arms and carried you through your room laying you down on your bed. His coat and tie had been immediately discarded across the room. You’d sat up to get a better look as he undid the buttons on his white dress shirt, biting your lip at the thought of running your hands across his bare skin. He stopped undressing himself to look back at you.
“You’re so beautiful.” He embraced you, fingers finding the zipper at the back of your gown. You allowed the sleeves to fall down your arms, exposing your chest to him. Immediately his lips had gone to trail along your collarbones. He mumbled ‘I love you’ as he went. Each kiss punctuated by the words you’d longed to hear from him. You pushed his shirt down his shoulders, letting your hands linger on his biceps, rubbing little circles on the perfect skin.
“Joon?” he answers you with a hmm. “Is this real?” he pulled away from you to meet your eyes.
“I hope so.” He responded before kissing you deeply again. When you’d gotten the chance you’d stood up and allowed the dress to puddle around your feet.  He reached out to pull you in again by your newly expose waist, positioning you underneath him. He’d kissed down your stomach until he reached the top of your underwear.
“Maybe we should stop here?” he’d said, pulling away from you, “I want our first time to be something amazing.” You’d nodded, a little reluctant, but you’d waited this long for him, you could wait a little longer. Instead you’d settled into your bed together, cuddled close in just your underwear, praying that you didn’t wake up from this dream.
Everything was perfect, you stayed together throughout both his and your university experience. The whole kingdom knew of their childhood sweethearts. The duke and the princess destined to be together. The night of your graduation, a large ball had been put together in your honour and while no one dared say it aloud, everyone was certain there were hidden intentions behind the congratulatory event. The feeling was in the air, the whole of the kingdom whispered rumours of how the young duke was going to propose. They wondered how it would be announced, if he was going to ask you in the middle of all the guest, or if he’d elect to be more private about it.
But then the day of the ball arrived and Namjoon wasn’t waiting for you at the bottom of the stairs like he usually would. You assumed he would be waiting somewhere to surprise you, but the whispers started as soon as you’d turned up to the ballroom unescorted. No one had seen him. The entire night people had congratulated you on graduating, but your heart wasn’t even your replies. Instead you’d spent the night searching every face in the room for a sign of your missing lover.
As the night wore on it became clear that he had no intentions of attending. You’d put every ounce of your princess training to good use that night as you tried not to cry, humiliated in front of everyone you had ever known.
Awaiting you in your bedroom at the end of the night was a bouquet of pink daisies and a simple note that said ‘I’m so sorry’
You wouldn’t see Namjoon again for two years…
Part 2
Masterlist
Losing Virginity drabble
Taglist: @uraveragefangirlsposts
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